Fast But Peaceful Home Birth Story of My 11-Pound Baby

Everyone tells you that your second birth will not be like your first, but I’m not a very good listener.

My first was 9 days late, so I happily planned for my parents to come visit us in Vermont over Memorial Day weekend 2022, even though I’d be 40 weeks and 2 days pregnant with my second. I was obsessed with the idea of swimming in their hotel pool, eating the best takeout, and having someone else watch my toddler for a while.

But I went into labor instead.

Early Labor (8:30–10:15 am)

Disclaimer: Some time stamps are exact because of phone records and my midwives’ log, but others are educated guesses. I wasn’t checked and we weren’t timing contractions, so I’m going off of how I felt and my knowledge of the labor stages.

My parents were supposed to come over for my famous Dutch Baby recipe that Saturday morning, but I was was just feeling off. Like, second-day-of-your-period crampy and gross. I was sitting on my beloved birth ball when I felt my first contraction at 8:30 am.

My husband Atlas and I weren’t getting our hopes up, but we joked about how perfect it would be to go into labor after a full night’s sleep. But then while he was helping our toddler Louisa get ready upstairs, I proceeded to have a couple more contractions about 3 minutes apart.

If you know anything about contraction spacing, this may be a hint at things to come.

Despite my conviction that I’d go late, I (fortunately) took this very seriously. My first labor was only 8 hours, and I had heard that subsequent births were often faster. So I called my midwife Alison (Vitality Home Birth) at 8:38 am to give her a head’s up that something might be happening. I had had a membrane sweep a couple days earlier, so she wasn’t surprised to hear from me.

By the time I hopped into the shower, the contractions became more serious. They weren’t painful, but I had to put my arms against the wall and bend forward as I concentrated on my breathing. At this point Atlas didn’t even know I was officially in labor, so I asked him if he was ready to have a baby today!

Thank god my parents were in town because we had an easy babysitting arrangement. Our original plan was to call my mother-in-law who lived 1.5 hours away, which included a ferry. Worst case scenario, my husband and doula would take turns watching Louisa. I had fretted about this for months, and all for nothing! Thanks Mom and Dad!

I called my doula Mary (Full Circle Doula Services) at 9:11 am and she asked if she had enough time to finish her family breakfast (it was Saturday morning, after all). I told her yes but then to make the 20-minute drive over right after. And when my midwife called at 9:30 to check in on me, I told her to head over too.

I felt so much peace in this moment! My daughter was taken care of, my midwife and doula were coming, and I didn’t have to go anywhere. All I had to do was have this baby.

I transformed my bedroom into a relaxing space: I got my ball and some wireless headphones, closed the door and the shades, turned on some twinkly lights, and had the AC blowing. I took a photo because I just felt so serene.

Looking at the photo in the moment, I knew I wasn’t in active labor yet. My favorite birth prep book “Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way.” talked about this exact phenomenon: When the laboring person is still able to happily pose for a photo, you’re still in early labor. Active laborers don’t make peace signs! So I got settled in for the road ahead.

Active Labor (10:15–11:30 am)

Once contractions started picking up, I switched to lying on the bed on my side and trying to fully release all tension during contractions. It was a technique I learned from the Bradley Method book that had served me well during my first labor.

I had mixed results this time. I’d have one contraction that I could totally relax through and then the next I’d be writhing and curling my toes. It felt as if someone was wringing out my body like a washcloth. I asked Atlas to lie down next to me during a few contractions, and that helped me relax.

Once my parents arrived to get Louisa, they visited me briefly between contractions. The most ridiculous thing happened when Louisa came to say goodbye. Picture me breathing through contractions, lying on my side trying to relax. What does she do? She comes in with her American flag (it was Memorial Day weekend, remember) and STABS ME IN THE EYE with the stick. (By accident of course.)

Nothing like getting your eye gouged out to take away labor pains for a minute.

My parents and Louisa left soon after (no more injuries, thankfully), and then my doula Mary arrived. She and Atlas started setting up the birth tub in the bedroom. I had rented a La Bassine birth pool from my midwife, so I had everything ready.

In case you’re curious, you inflate the tub like a giant kiddie pool and fill it up by connecting a clean hose to the bathroom sink. And then after everything is done, the water (et cetera) is sucked out of the tub with a sump pump, like you use in a wet basement.

By this point, I couldn’t WAIT to get in the tub. The contractions were starting to get the best of me and I knew the water would offer me some reprieve. During my first birth, I labored in the tiny bathtub they had in the hospital room, so I knew how good it could feel.

I got in the tub at 11:15, and relief immediately washed over me with the warmth of the water and the buoyancy that relieved the pressure. I was working through some tough contractions by focusing on my breathing and trying to release any tension.

me in labor land. I had requested a cool cloth for my forehead and some dried mango to eat. At some point the mango fell in the tub lol. (Photo by my doula, Mary)

I mostly handled the contractions by myself. Mary and Atlas would occasionally say nice things to me, but I didn’t need any hands-on support. I was sitting/reclining on my back, and sometimes turning on my side. And boy was I hot. I switched sides so I could have the A/C blowing directly on my face.

Transition (11:30–11:40 am)

After some serious work laboring in the tub, I started to feel like things were changing. I remember telling Atlas and Mary that I needed their help. I asked them to say encouraging things to me during contractions.

When my next contraction hit, they both said, “Good job,” at the same time, which made me laugh. What I really needed was for someone to hold my face in their hands, look me in the eyes, and tell me I could do this!!

That’s one of the trickier parts of labor—properly vocalizing your wants and needs.

But none of us would have expected that I was in transition after less than 3 hours of labor. Thankfully I knew enough about the emotional signposts of labor to remember that my self-doubt probably meant that the end was in sight.

My midwife Alison had arrived, and she was setting up her gear in Louisa’s room. (Among other things, she was equipped with life-saving supplies such as medication to control bleeding, IV fluids, oxygen, and resuscitation equipment.)

Despite me being generally opposed to cervical checks (I just think they mess with your head more than anything), by the time I felt this “Are we done yet?” feeling, I was like PLEASE, for the love of god, check me!! I asked Mary to call Alison over. It was actually the first time I had seen Alison since she had arrived.

Much to everyone’s surprise (except me), I was 10 cm. LFG!!!!!!!!

Pushing (11:40–11:55 am)

My water hadn’t broken, so I didn’t feel the urge to push. (For comparison, my body was pushing all on its own with my first birth.) Alison told me I could try to do some pushes to see if my water would break and relieve some of the pressure. I liked the way that sounded, but I was also fascinated by the idea of an en caul birth.

I decided to push through 2 or 3 contractions and then my water broke with a HUGE explosion!! (Fortunately I was already in the water!) It really felt exactly like a water balloon popping between my legs. We could see the water breaking, which meant that it wasn’t clear so there was probably meconium. No one really made it seem like an issue, so I wasn’t worried.

Around this time, the assistant midwife Heidi arrived just in time!! She had a longer drive, so we really weren’t sure if she’d make it.

With my water broken, it was easier to feel what I needed to do to push effectively. The weird thing was then my contractions started to slow down. It felt like it took foreverrrr to wait for the next contraction until I could push again. I remember just looking around between contractions at the 4 faces staring at me, but all I could do was twiddle my thumbs.

Pushing was more uncomfortable than with Louisa’s birth—I remember saying “ow” a few times because it really stung when Violet was crowning. It also just felt like a ton of pressure, like a huge bowling ball between my legs. I didn’t change positions, even though I’ve read all the literature about squatting, all fours, and using gravity. Nothing could’ve gotten me to move at this point!

I pushed for about 10 minutes and her head came out up to her chin. Alison checked to make sure her cord wasn’t holding her head back, and it wasn’t. Next push the rest of her head came out.

We were on alert for shoulder dystocia since we knew Violet would be a big baby. During prenatal appointments, Alison and I had talked about positions we would try if she did get stuck. But thankfully the rest of her body came out just fine in a couple more contractions.

Violet Eve was born at 11:55 am, only 3.5 hours after my first contraction. I felt such a wonderful physical relief when she came out! Alison handed her to me right away and I held her on my chest and kissed her little head and cheeks. I was just so happy to see her!

Immediate Postpartum / 3rd Stage of Labor

Violet and I hung out in the tub for a while, me smiling and laughing and her crying. But what a relief to hear her strong, healthy cry! My birth team encouraged me to keep her body in the warm water, and they turned off my beloved AC so she wouldn’t be cold. I was pretty spent, so my midwives also had to keep reminding me to hold her up on my body to make sure her face wasn’t in the water.

The placenta was taking its sweet time, so we decided to transition to the bed for the third stage. My cord was short, so someone needed to hold Violet near my waist level, and someone else helped me walk the few feet to the bed. That was an amusing parade! We were also all wet so the bed was covered in towels.

I couldn’t quite relax until the placenta was out—it was physically a little uncomfortable and I was worried that something could still go wrong. I had hemorrhaged at this stage with Lou, so I had been taking iron supplements throughout pregnancy to get a better outcome this time.

But a few minutes later I pushed the placenta out easily. Everything was so fine that I couldn’t quite believe it. I kept asking Alison if we were really all set. I didn’t even have any tearing so I didn’t need any stitches.

All the work was done. I could just lie in bed and enjoy my new baby as my birth team cleaned up.

I put Violet to my breast, and she latched right away. Another moment of disbelief and satisfaction because I had done everything in my power during pregnancy to try to have a positive breastfeeding journey this time.

After they let us have some time to ourselves, the midwives did the newborn and postpartum exams and weighed Violet. We all knew she would be big, but no one expected her to be 11 pounds even and 23” long! I felt like a badass having had such a lovely, peaceful birth with such a big baby.

The best part about having a home birth is after the business is done, you’re already HOME! I could lie in my own bed, eat my own food, and use my own bathroom. Plus I could see my toddler when she came home later that day (it was 2022 so she wouldn’t have been allowed to visit the hospital). Such a blessing!

I am so grateful to my incredible birth team (Alison, Mary, and Heidi) who provided me with so much peace during my pregnancy and birth. I trusted them wholeheartedly and never doubted my decision to have a home birth. Thank you to my husband Atlas for being a supportive partner of all my birth choices!